The story of the snowman
Moderator: Bootsy
-
- I luv DDK!
- Posts: 907
- Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2008 4:20 pm
- Location: West Sussex
The story of the snowman
It had been snowing all night, so at
8.00: I made a snowman
8.10: A feminist passed by and asked me why didn't I make a snow woman.
8.15: So I made a snow woman
8.17: My feminist neighbour complained about the size of the snow woman's big breasts (I'm a bloke!) saying it demeaned women.
8.20: The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead.
8.22: The transgender person asked why I didn't make just one snow person with detachable parts.
8.25: The vegans at the end of the road complained about the carrot nose, saying food shouldn't be used as decoration.
8.28: I am being called a racist because the snowman is white (I've seen yellow snow but I've never seen brown snow.)
8.31: The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wears a burka.
8.40: The police arrive saying someone has been offended.
8.42: The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicts women in a domestic role.
8.43: The Council Equalities officer arrives and threatens me with eviction.
8.45: The TV news crew from the BBC show up and ask if I know the difference between snowmen and snow women? I reply "Snowballs" and am called a sexist.
9.00: I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9.10: My children are taken by social services.
9.15: Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be locked up.
There is no moral to this story, it's just the world today and it's going to get worse!
8.00: I made a snowman
8.10: A feminist passed by and asked me why didn't I make a snow woman.
8.15: So I made a snow woman
8.17: My feminist neighbour complained about the size of the snow woman's big breasts (I'm a bloke!) saying it demeaned women.
8.20: The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead.
8.22: The transgender person asked why I didn't make just one snow person with detachable parts.
8.25: The vegans at the end of the road complained about the carrot nose, saying food shouldn't be used as decoration.
8.28: I am being called a racist because the snowman is white (I've seen yellow snow but I've never seen brown snow.)
8.31: The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wears a burka.
8.40: The police arrive saying someone has been offended.
8.42: The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicts women in a domestic role.
8.43: The Council Equalities officer arrives and threatens me with eviction.
8.45: The TV news crew from the BBC show up and ask if I know the difference between snowmen and snow women? I reply "Snowballs" and am called a sexist.
9.00: I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9.10: My children are taken by social services.
9.15: Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be locked up.
There is no moral to this story, it's just the world today and it's going to get worse!
Porsche 356B T6 (modified), Porsche Macan Turbo , Porsche SSE, Dax 289 Cobra, Buell S2 Thunderbolt, Honda ST 70/125, Harley Davidson custom evo softail
-
- Nurse, I think I need some assistance
- Posts: 8048
- Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2004 12:28 am
- Location: Scotland
Re: The story of the snowman
I’m quite surprised health and safety weren’t round too.
What happens if a burglar walks into that in the dead of night and falls on his crowbar and sustains serious injury. You are going to be in serious bother for not having your snowpersons wearing reflective jackets, coned-off and illuminated at night.
Regards
Mike
What happens if a burglar walks into that in the dead of night and falls on his crowbar and sustains serious injury. You are going to be in serious bother for not having your snowpersons wearing reflective jackets, coned-off and illuminated at night.
Regards
Mike
_____________________________
73 RS (Sold)
67 S
Mint T (Sold)
996 Turbo (Sold)
73 2.4E (home after 25 years) and Sold again
73T targa (signal yellow project)
1953 Vauxhall Velox
914/6
1963 356B
https://www.mybespokeroom.com/
73 RS (Sold)
67 S
Mint T (Sold)
996 Turbo (Sold)
73 2.4E (home after 25 years) and Sold again
73T targa (signal yellow project)
1953 Vauxhall Velox
914/6
1963 356B
https://www.mybespokeroom.com/
Re: The story of the snowman
“Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
-
- Nurse, I think I need some assistance
- Posts: 8048
- Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2004 12:28 am
- Location: Scotland
Re: The story of the snowman
Been thinking about this and just to be sure I’d have a notice made up at the end of the drive explaining how things can be slippy underfoot in your garden following snow or extremely cold weather (you’d better add a figure just to be sure, say ‘ likely at or below zero degrees centigrade’, and that the snow many pile up or accumulate ‘for whatever reason’ in any part of your property. This may continue to be so until well after the visual signs of whiteness have disappeared.
That should cover you for burglars, the postpersons, binpersons and neighbours etc.
Regards
Mike
That should cover you for burglars, the postpersons, binpersons and neighbours etc.
Regards
Mike
_____________________________
73 RS (Sold)
67 S
Mint T (Sold)
996 Turbo (Sold)
73 2.4E (home after 25 years) and Sold again
73T targa (signal yellow project)
1953 Vauxhall Velox
914/6
1963 356B
https://www.mybespokeroom.com/
73 RS (Sold)
67 S
Mint T (Sold)
996 Turbo (Sold)
73 2.4E (home after 25 years) and Sold again
73T targa (signal yellow project)
1953 Vauxhall Velox
914/6
1963 356B
https://www.mybespokeroom.com/
-
- Nurse, I think I need some assistance
- Posts: 4062
- Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2010 8:56 am
- Location: Cambridge
Re: The story of the snowman
I came here for old cars.
Kindly naff off to the Daily Mail jokes page with this.
It makes me sad that there are people that share my hobby that think this sort of thing is funny.
Kindly naff off to the Daily Mail jokes page with this.
It makes me sad that there are people that share my hobby that think this sort of thing is funny.
964 C2 Targa. 205 1.6 GTi. Testarossa. Fisher Fury Fireblade. Motorhome. Motorbikes. Scooters. Pushbikes. Threadbare Saucony Peregrines. Dog. Human relations and friends. 97.5%-built house.
Re: The story of the snowman
Snowflake ?Sam wrote:I came here for old cars.
Kindly naff off to the Daily Mail jokes page with this.
It makes me sad that there are people that share my hobby that think this sort of thing is funny.
“Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
-
- Nurse, I think I need some assistance
- Posts: 5115
- Joined: Wed May 25, 2005 12:39 pm
- Location: Hampshire
Re: The story of the snowman
I think you have to be a millennial to be a snowflake...
cheers, Mike.
previously..
1994 968 Club Sport Riviera Blue
1994 993 C2 Carrera Riviera Blue
1972 911S to Martini RSR Prototype Spec
1973 911E to RS Lightweight Specification
1981 924 Carrera GT ex Mexborough car
3.2 Carrera Sport x2
previously..
1994 968 Club Sport Riviera Blue
1994 993 C2 Carrera Riviera Blue
1972 911S to Martini RSR Prototype Spec
1973 911E to RS Lightweight Specification
1981 924 Carrera GT ex Mexborough car
3.2 Carrera Sport x2
Re: The story of the snowman
Wot about us snowman ?Mike wrote:I think you have to be a millennial to be a snowflake...
“Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..
1971 911 2.2T sold
1970 911 2.2S Sold but remains within DDK
1959 Lancia Flaminia PF Coupe
-
- Nurse, I think I need some assistance
- Posts: 4062
- Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2010 8:56 am
- Location: Cambridge
Re: The story of the snowman
Not me man. I was just joking.richkaz wrote:Snowflake ?
I'm just as much of a racist and homophobe as the next man.
964 C2 Targa. 205 1.6 GTi. Testarossa. Fisher Fury Fireblade. Motorhome. Motorbikes. Scooters. Pushbikes. Threadbare Saucony Peregrines. Dog. Human relations and friends. 97.5%-built house.