A positive attitude

[Tosh]

Monday night I gradually woke up stiff as a plank in the hospital's ICU, tubes up my nose & down my throat,
wires monitoring every function and all around my head, hell of a pain over my left ear, and a gorgeous nurse
hovering over me.

It was obvious I'd been in a serious accident.

She looked at me deep and steady and I heard her slowly say, 'You may not feel anything from the waist down.'

I managed to mumble in reply,

'Can I feel your tits, then?'