still my fav joke - short and funny

Please post your jokes here, we do have a sense of humour! (keep it clean though)

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IanMcLeod
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by IanMcLeod »

I've been told six out of seven dwarfs aren't happy.
A sponge and a rusty spanner

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Bruce M
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still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by Bruce M »

A stern woman arrives in Cyprus and approach the customs desk.

Customs officer: name?
Woman: Angela Merkel

Customs officer: Occupation?
Woman: No, just visiting.
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jeffnudd
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by jeffnudd »

My wife said to me tonight "I want you to make love to me like in the movies" so i shagged her up the a*se and c*m over her face.
Apparently we don't watch the same movies.
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decapman
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by decapman »

When I first saw my wife I thought she was a fox....




She was Ginger and eating out of a dustbin.
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210bhp
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by 210bhp »

What's the similarity between an Essex girls legs and the Beatles?


Neither have been together since the sixties.

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Jimmy
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by Jimmy »

My wife said she is leaving me, apparently it’s due to my obsession with football, I couldn’t believe it – we have been married for nearly 10 seasons!!


----------------
Jimmy
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richkaz
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by richkaz »

Tattoo artist to Emma Peel - Once did a tattoo on a bloke with skinny arms but couldn't fit the message in.
Emma Peel - What was the message ?
Tattoo artist - ' A house is not a home without a mothers touch '
Emma Peel - What did you manage to fit in ?
Tattoo artist - ' A house is not a home without a moth '
“Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three
decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good "..

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neilbardsley
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by neilbardsley »

KS wrote:
MT wrote:What's the difference between a clitoris and a golf ball?


Men will spend 5 minutes looking for a golf ball.
Alternative version:

What's the difference between a clitoris and a golf ball?

It only takes five minutes to find a golf ball.
On this front.

What is the difference between your c*ck and bonus?

Your Mrs will blow the bonus!
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mycar
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Re: still my fav joke - short and funny

Post by mycar »

Sorry to hear that Neil. :|

Mike.
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